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I then drifted back to sleep, but not before my dad shook me again and said, "Kevin, what the f-k is this? Are you gay? If you're gay you can tell me."įrustrated, mostly because I was trying to sleep, I slurred, "Fine, I'm gay. I was still sleeping when he did this, because he sometimes kept odd hours, and he shook me awake and said "what is this?"Ĭompletely out of it, I said "It's nothing, I just found it and put it in my pocket." My father did my laundry, and he found the flyer in my pocket while collecting my dirty clothes. I was starting to feel so comfortable, I put a postcard for a future gay party in my pant pocket and took it home. I felt OK that my parents didn't know and may not ever know. Newly out, I attended my first gay bar with a friend and I slowly started to feel like I was getting to know the real me. After way too long hiding who I was, and some dangerous situations that tend to happen when you're trying to act on who you are, but don't have the reference or support to handle it. So, at first, when I was finally ready - on my 20th birthday - I began coming out to everyone but my family. Their attitudes also made me feel like the world would be just as hostile. I didn't know what allyship meant, but even so, I knew these people weren't allies, and I decided they were the last people I'd ever want to come out to. Meanwhile my mother would point at people she suspected were gay, and make a limp wrist gesture to me. My father said "faggot" and "queer" (pejoratively) with abandon, like when a ref made a bad call during a hockey game. And I was even awarded a medal for being an altar boy.īoth Amanda Jette Knox's partner and child have come out as trans, and the experience has been eye-opening for their family.Īs for my parents being homophobic, I had many reasons to suspect this as a child. Paul to the Corinthians coming from a mile away. I was so Catholic, I could sit, stand and genuflect on command.
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I was too terrified to tell them, mostly because I grew up Catholic. I didn't come out to my parents the way I wanted to.
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